craving chocolate

I had an insatiable craving for food today, mostly chocolate! My stomach was a black hole and I ate my way through a bagel, dried fruit and nuts, a crumpet, muesli with almond milk, a protein bar, a smoothie, chocolate...some days I guess you just need more calories than other days. I am learning to listen to my body and try to eat what I want instead of what I think I should eat.

Loving being blonde

I had a childcare class tonight but I didn't learn much, we're just easing into the term and it's mostly just introductory stuff. Yesterday was nice because it was my Mum's birthday (happy birthday Mum!) and I went out to lunch with her and my sister. I ordered rosemary and brown rice cakes with a beetroot and feta salad, it was pretty good. Later on in the night we had a family birthday party- it was roast chicken with vegetables and gravy, although Fern and I abstained from the gravy and chicken. It was a difficult night for me as I ate a large portion of birthday cake, and I feel sad to admit this but I caved into my stupid bulimic urges and ended up in the bathroom afterwards.

I think that in order to recover properly I have to make sure that I am more mindful about what I eat so I can digest it happily without any eating disordered behaviour. Something to work on for the future! I am so close to being recovered I can taste it (no pun intended) and I just have to keep starting fresh and working until I get there.